Meditation is all about your attitude

It took me a while to truly grasp the essence of mindfulness. For a long time, I was meditating daily, expecting big changes — but in reality, I was just sitting there, meditating without real mindfulness.

In this article, we’ll explore why having the right attitude during mindfulness practice is crucial, and how it can genuinely help shift personality traits from anger and impatience towards kindness and compassion.

 

First, why wasn’t meditation alone enough to change me?

When we hear about mindfulness, we often link it with meditation, presence, and awareness. While these elements are important, they are not mindfulness by themselves. Without the right attitude and intention, you’re simply paying attention.

 

You can be fully aware and still be judgmental.

You can be fully present and still act harshly.

You can meditate regularly but still feel frustrated.

(And honestly, most of us have experienced this!)

 

Awareness is like turning on a light in a dark, messy room — if your reaction is to get angry or critical, that’s not mindfulness.

One model that completely reshaped my practice is Dr. Shauna Shapiro’s I.A.A Model, emphasizing:

• Intention: Why are you practicing? Setting a heart-centered intention — like “to be more present” or “to ease my suffering” — gives direction and motivation for your practice.

• Attention: Mindfulness centers on present moment awareness. Our minds wander about 47% of the time! Attention teaches us to notice thoughts without getting lost in them.
• Attitude: This is where real transformation happens. It’s not enough to simply notice — we must meet our experience with kindness, compassion, and non-judgment.

 

Science now shows that the brain can rewire itself — a concept called neuroplasticity. Whatever you practice gets stronger. If you constantly meet thoughts with anger or frustration, those neural pathways deepen. If you meet them with kindness and acceptance, you rewire your brain for compassion and patience.

Mindfulness, when paired with the right attitude, becomes life-changing.

 

So, how do we practice the right attitude during meditation?

Decide to shift your inner dialogue. Speak to yourself as you would to a small child — with gentleness, humor, and forgiveness. Laughter is welcome!

When your mind wanders (which it will), instead of getting mad (“Oh no, I messed up again!”), try saying:

• “Oops, there’s that wandering thought again. No big deal, back to the breath!”
• “Hey buddy, we’re practicing mindfulness — let’s gently refocus.”

 

At first, this may feel awkward or even silly — but that’s a sign you’re changing old habits.

Even when frustration arises, use it as another moment to practice softness:

• “Oops, feeling frustrated again! That’s okay — I’m learning.”

As long as your intention fuels your attention, you’ll keep finding chances to practice the right attitude — gradually reshaping your mind and heart for a kinder, more patient way of being.